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Thread: Depression

  1. #1
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    Default Depression

    I don't know if anyone comes here or not but I thought I would write about my depression.

    Is it seasonal since we are still having winter? I don't think so.

    I just want to stay in the house. I have no desire to do anything. I haven't been to my woman's group in months. I'm afraid that I'll be kicked out if I don't start going but every Monday I change my mind and not go. The meetings are held on Mondays.

    I'm tired of the meds not working. Maybe I'll feel like this for the rest of my life. Always changing meds. This new pdoc is trying the same meds that I have been on before. I just give up and try them again. My pdoc said I would be on my meds for the rest of my life. That depressed me even more. I watch other people get off their meds and lead a normal life. I want that.

    It's it weird that I really have no reason to be depressed. My life is just fine. There is no stress. The family tries hard to make everything o.k. I don't feel like it's o.k. I feel like I'm missing something.

    My friends have moved on to other things in their careers. I don't have anything in common with them since I'm not working. We get together and I really have nothing to talk about. I miss working.

    Sorry that I went on and on about nothing important.
    Take care,
    Dawn

  2. #2
    Community Member Deedeelyn's Avatar
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    oh Dawn, your feelings are very important. Depression is hard, just plain hard. I have heard that once you go off an antidepressant it is not as effective if you go back on it. I don't know what your taking but I hope you find something to help you. It's so hard to get motivated especially since you haven't worked in a while and not finding pleasure in things is a normal symptom. I struggle with that too.

    I found that trying to set a small goal each day to be helpful. It took me a long time to even want to set any goals for fear I wouldn't complete them. Right now I'm in the middle if studying for my finals in the classes I've taken. I'm in my second semester taking only two classes each semester. can not believe I have made it this far. Lots of times I just wanted to quit but here I am setting a goal each day and I'm almost done.

    Is there anywhere you can go and take a class of interest to you? I started back to school by getting online and scanning the classes my local college carried. Found a couple and I don't have any regrets. Just feel good I was able to do it. We also have book clubs at libraries that I joined and the art institute in town holds art classes. Keep looking and you might find something you like to do.

    Volunteering is good too. One time I called the Child neglect and abuse council and asked if they had anything I might be able to help them with. So I stuffed envelopes for them one afternoon. They were so grateful and it gave me one afternoon with a couple of very nice ladies and chatting.

    I have that trouble with my family on running out of things to say or feeling like I had nothing important to say. You do have a lot to share. I hope you find your voice.

    anyway , just related to your post and wanted to say something. You are not alone in your depression. I hope the spring weather helps you feel better once it quits snowing over where you are.

    Dee

  3. #3
    Distinguished Community Member Ging's Avatar
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    Dawn honey,
    I hear you loud and clear,I know what depression is ,believe me.
    In away I am about to become like you....I don't work, was a stay at home mom for fifty years,now my world has changed, I will be entering therapy , I have been put on medication ...but I don't know for how long, I just have to carve out a new life for me with the guidance and the support from you good people here. We are here for each other,your are important, we are your " We " ((( hug))) GING

  4. #4
    Distinguished Community Member houghchrst's Avatar
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    Oh dawn honey I'm so sorry you are struggling with this. Finding that I was going to have to take medication the rest of my life was depressing in itself. Yes some people can go off of the meds but many wind up going back or not doing well without them. There are also those that get depressed and take meds then get off of them because theirs may be situational or they are having a bad patch in life. Fr those like us sometimes life seems to be the bad patch lol.

    hang in there, find something you like to do and do it again. Maybe it is time to see a new doc if you are just revisiting old meds. Are you med sensitive? Ask your psych about genome testing.

    ((((hugs)))) I hope you feel better soon. Try to get out and at least get some fresh air everyday.

  5. #5
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    Thank you all for your kind words. IT'S just one of those pity parties happening.
    Take care,
    Dawn

  6. #6
    Distinguished Community Member tic chick's Avatar
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    dawn ,

    depression isn't a pity party, it is what it is. and it IS important!

    i know you are planning your daughter's wedding. i also know you do take several trips during the year. does doing things like that make you happy? have you identified what does make you happy? maybe making a list of things that make you happy would be a good start. maybe you will realize you aren't always depressed. i know you liked your ladies group. sometimes even though we're depressed, we have to make ourselves do those things that make us happy, cause the longer you stay away from something that makes you happy, the harder it is to get back doing it and other things that make you happy.

    i know that if you take meds for depression that stopping them sometimes causes worse depression and depression that lasts longer. it is hard to realize you might be on meds your whole life. i think you have to know that the alternative is not a very good life. if i didn't take my meds for panic attacks, i would still be having them.

    it seems the meds you are taking aren't really working and i can understand that would be frustrating. i think if the meds you took actually worked, you wouldn't be so depressed. maybe ask the doc to increase your dose a bit and see if that helps. you have to balance dose and positive effects with side effects. there are so many meds for depression. sometimes the older meds work better than the newer ones. maybe sitting down with your doc and talking about how you feel and discussing other med options might be helpful. if your doctor doesn't respond, maybe a fresh set of eyes is what you need. meds that work are so much better than meds that don't work .

    dawn, you've been a member of our group for so long and you've helped so many of us with your support and just being here. i care about you and want you to feel the best you can!

    take care of yourself ,
    jeannie
    Here's to good women. May we know them. May we be them. May we raise them.
    "The world is a better place when you're barefoot." Mark
    "Don't go there unless you know the way back." TC
    "...there will be an answer. Let it be." Paul McCartney

  7. #7
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    Dawn,just noticed this thread. since I also suffer from depression I have a few comments to add. change your meds! so much to choose from & this goes right along with it-change your doc!you deserve to be happy Dawn so make some changes PLEASE. you only have one life so don't be wasting it. you matter! this isn't your fault. no different from any other illness in my opinion. cut TV news out of your life. force yourself to go the woman's group. hopefully snow will go away & you can get outside.

    talk about the wedding (we do enjoy hearing from you!) keep us informed we all love you ya know! Pati

  8. #8
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    i second that pati. and i love reading about the wedding, trips the yards, gardening, anything to get my mind off my humdrum life. and it helps tide me through the day.

  9. #9
    Distinguished Community Member Jo6's Avatar
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    Red face

    Dawn my dear, you are such a kind and loving lady, never having a bad word to say about anybody. I agree with all that has been posted here.

    I am 70 yrs. old and I have suffered depression for as long as I can remember. I have taken meds. for most of these years. When I was younger I had high hopes of getting off the meds, feeling much better, very high hopes. Well, my hopes all came crashing down one day. I had been doing some research on depression, causes etc. I talked to my Dr. about it, he sent me back to the Psychiatrist .

    He had counselor's working in his office.

    My talks with her was the best thing that helped me except who I was, background on family going back quiet a ways. Turns out depression had been an unwelcome guest to many of my relatives. So, what to do? Took my meds., got involved in things, sometimes it worked, sometimes not. When things begun to get bad again I went back to Dr. A med. change usually did the trick. If not we tried something else.

    Dawn, you are still young. You've got a long life ahead to enjoy. Please don't feel bad about how you feel. It really is a shame many families will not talk about depression. I went thru a lot until I decided talking to family or close friends was not to be. It hurt at first, but I soon got over that. I also found therapist were different and I had to hunt the "right" one.

    Since my health has gotten so bad I've been having some real trouble keeping the depression down. Recently my Dr. suggested I try therapy again. Dawn, I am very glad I did. She can't solve my problems, but she can help me work on some things that has dogged me for a very long time.

    Like Joy said, I think we are all excited about your daughters wedding. When I catered I was often asked to decorate church or wherever as well as the reception and all involved. I loved doing this. I know I will never be the Mother of the Bride, but I'll get thru that too. I hope it becomes a very happy time for you..

    color me :encouragement

    I care about you deeply, Dawn
    Did you ever know that you're my hero and every thing I would like to be I can fly higher than an eagle
    'cause you are the wind beneath my wings

    for my brother Ben

  10. #10
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    Today is my birthday, and I'm 67. I've been depressed since I was a very young child...yes, as young as 3.
    I was fortunate to have understanding, educated parents, who got help for me. Of course, this was a long time ago.
    Over the years, I've had lots of treatment...many different medications, hospitalizations, ECT treatments.....
    My depression is biological/chemical. I now manage on my own, no longer am able to see a therapist/psych, because of insurance crap. My GP prescribes my antidepressant. I keep myself busy with my volunteer job at the zoo, and my birds at home.

    Sometimes things are very hard, but I try to keep positive.

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