What do you think

[lor]

My 83 yr old FIL has been in the hosp. since March. He wrote in his will that he does not want 'to be connected to tubes', however he is. (They can't just pull them out & 'throw him away'). But he wants to eat again so after talking with hospis they decided he could go home with my neice, where he can be fazed into eating ice cream, a cookie, or a burger. My neice was to stay in the house with him. He was home the other afternoon. The next morning John & I went & it didn't look to good, he was happy but Kim (my niece) had bags under her eyes cuz of no sleep for hours, her 1 & 1/2 yr. dd was sreaming & there,s a 2 month old too (I forgot he (my FIL) has some sorta bug & the 1 & 1/2 yr. old is not imune.) Hospis saw this & the mess & took him back to hosp. When his other neice (a nurse) comes he can go home with her there. When he 1st left it seems everyone was yelling at each other. Another neice yelled at my dd cuz she wouldn't stay & help Kim with my FIL, & etc. I was thinking of writing to Kim as if I was my FIL saying something like "You are the best grandaughter, thankyou hun.You couldn't help it that they took me. ............". Love Garandpa (just as something to make her smile)

Kim feels like a failure & I bet thinks her sisters will do the usual & say things to her.

Do you think that is a wise/good idea to write. Kim is in her mid 20s.

[JanM]

I would think so, but not as your FIL, but tell her how YOU feel about her. I think that would mean a lot to her.

[lor]

She cared for her other grandpa too, till he died. They lived in her mom's house. She was the primary care giver but she had her family close by. That was Virginia, grandpa K. is in Ohio. Maybe she thought 'I did it with grandpa O. so I can go to Ohio & do it with grandpa K.'

[lor]

I ended up sending it. It says "this is grandpa" & "you are the best grandaughter" but I signed my name so she knows who realy sent it. (he can't write)