
Originally Posted by
Earth Mother 2 Angels
((((((Hugs to All)))))) ~
I haven't been able to find a way to re-watch the episode, so here is what I wrote immediately after viewing it with Jon.
SPEECHLESS Season 1/Episode 3
My gut reaction to this episode is disappointment. It feels like too much is crammed into the less than 1/2 hour show, and all of it is significant, worthy of more attention and development.
MOM
Mom is becoming overdone, and I fear that she is going to devolve into a caricature, rather than a complex character. Ignoring or sloughing off her other two children, with constant devotion to JJ, is not appealing. It is unfair to her children, and it is imbalanced.
SIBLINGS
I don’t have experience in raising a non-disabled child, as well as a child with disabilities. Both of my sons required all of my attention, and all of my fighting for their rights and inclusion. I’ve known many families with special needs children and non-disabled children. In some cases, the non-disabled child felt responsible for his/her disabled sibling, as well as left out by his/her parent(s) ~ typically a single Mom. But in many more cases, the non-disabled child is loved, cherished, encouraged, and becomes a strong advocate for his/her disabled sibling.
JJ’s siblings are coping with these feelings. Kenneth tells JJ’s sister that she’s into running, because JJ can’t run. This is taking away her individuality. JJ’s brother, Ray, is struggling as an awkward adolescent with the dysfunctionality of his family.
DAD
Their home is filled with junk. It’s a mess. Embarrassing.
Dad says that collecting junk is the result of having a child with special needs, and then he tells Ray that JJ turned out better than the other kids, “who will not be named.” Even if Dad is joking, it’s hurtful.
CANCELING THE BONFIRE
Mom was wrong to insist on canceling the bonfire, because it wasn’t accessible to JJ. A better way to approach this issue would have been to brainstorm on how to make the beach accessible for JJ. Lay some plywood on the sand, so his wheelchair can traverse over it to the bonfire and back to the parking lot. Find a beach that is accessible. Create a new tradition, which would be accessible. (Bonfires in California, even at the beach, might be prohibited during our drought, in fact.)
Instead, Mom sets up a situation, where JJ’s peers believe that he is the reason why they can’t have what they want and are used to having. I get the point here, of course. I don’t know how many times I heard from parents of regular ed kids that my kids “special needs,” (and yes, they used air quotes) were taking away educational opportunities from their kids. No. School districts have separate funding for regular ed and special ed.
This was a teachable moment for viewers, who aren’t familiar with special needs children. And “Speechless" blew it.
And how is it remedied? Mom ties JJ to the goal posts and allows his peers to believe the opposing football team did it. Lying. Perpetuating the concept of intolerance, by using JJ as a prop. How does this help JJ? Or his peers? It doesn’t.
QUIRKINESS OF THE FAMILY
Last week, it was sending pizzas to a neighbor as a prank. This week, it was “stealing” the belongings of a girl in Ray’s class, thinking it was trash on the curb. Ray returns the goods, only to discover ALL of the girls in his class are at this home. Humiliation. For a teenager, that is particularly deflating. I was sad for Ray.
Why are Mom and Dad completely over the top in their quirkiness? Does Dad work? Does Mom work? What is the income source for this family? Why can’t they put some elbow grease into tidying up their home, fixing/repairing it, tending to their yard? At least Dad did clean up on Ray’s behalf. They could all work together to make their home a pleasant place to live, but they don't want to invest in it, because they'll likely move again to find a better school for JJ. That's not how it works here. I can testify to that.
And, I’ve got to say it: Last week, I didn’t appreciate that the entire family told the neighborhood that they were “Idiots.” That they would be the worst neighbors imaginable. “If a package meant for you is delivered to our house, we’ll keep it.” That’s not funny to me at all.
BECAUSE I have children with disabilities, I make an extra effort to be nice to my neighbors. I don’t want people to think that I’m angry, bitter, burdened, and over stressed. There have been times, when I’ve been pushed to my limit with some of our neighbors, but for the most part, I go along to get along.
I see stereotyping in Speechless, and that concerns me. I can relate to some of the scenes, but on the whole, after watching this episode, I have my qualms about its direction.
Rating (1 out of 10): 3
Love & Light,
Rose