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Thread: If I get Dementia...

  1. #1
    Distinguished Community Member Jeanie Z's Avatar
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    Dec 2006

    Smile If I get Dementia...

    :) My friend gave me this and I thought it was so good I'd share it with all of you.

    When you work in dementia care, people tend to ask you a lot of questions. Probably one of the most common questions that I hear is,

    ďAre you afraid to get dementia when youíre older?Ē

    Honestly, there are many things that scare me much more than dementia does. Donít get me wrong: dementia is a terrible group of diseases. I've been fortunate, however, to see many of the beautiful moments that people with dementia can experience.

    Just in case I do get dementia, I've written a list of rules Iíd like to live by.

    If I get dementia, Iíd like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live.
    If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality. If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think weíre visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. Iíll be much happier for it.
    If I get dementia, I donít want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
    If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that Iíve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
    If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.
    If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
    If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
    If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I donít eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
    If I get dementia, donít talk about me as if Iím not in the room.
    If I get dementia, donít feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Itís not your fault, and youíve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.
    If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
    If I get dementia, donít act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. Itís not my fault.
    If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing within earshot.
    If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original places.
    If I get dementia, don't exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
    If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
    If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.
    Jeanie :)

  2. #2
    Distinguished Community Member SuzE-Q's Avatar
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    Nov 2006


    Wow, Jeanie, thanks! I love it!

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  4. #3
    Distinguished Community Member Earth Mother 2 Angels's Avatar
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    Oct 2006
    Blog Entries


    ((((((Jeanie)))))) ~

    Thank you so much for sharing this! It's quite insightful, and something I will share with others and keep on hand just in case I need it someday for myself.

    It all rings very true to me, as several of my loved ones had dementia.

    Love & Light,

    Mom to Jon, 49, (seizure disorder; Gtube; trache; colostomy; osteoporosis; hypothyroid; enlarged prostate; lymphedema, assorted mysteries) and Michael, 32, (intractable seizures; Gtube), who were born with an undiagnosed progressive neuromuscular disease and courageous spirits. Our Angel Michael received his wings in 2003 and now resides in Heaven. Our Angel Jon lives at home with me and Jim, the world's most wonderful Dad.

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  6. #4
    Distinguished Community Member
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    Oct 2006
    North Carolina


    Jeanie, thanks for sharing this. I too will keep this on hand in case something happens to me. Just maybe someone will read it who cares about me.

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  8. #5
    Distinguished Community Member SalpalSally's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006


    There are many here here with varying degrees of dementia.
    Most of the time I have no problem dealing with them, but when
    I am having a panic attack about something then it is hard to do.
    They are all so sweet and there but for the grace of God, go I.
    Love, Sally

    "The best way out is always through". Robert Frost

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