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houghchrst

  1. A week into the

    New Year and I feel like crap. Now withdrawaling from most of my psych meds. My Klonopin is going to be missed the most. No sleep without it. Only until Friday. I think I can make it until then. That's funny cause it is not like I have a choice.

    Child Protective Services was here this week regarding the fact that marijuana tested positive in the baby's meconium back when she first found out she was pregnant. She'd used but didn't know she was pregnant. So of course CPS was called and
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  2. The new year

    is here and since my self make over is failing I am trying to decide if I should get back on track or if I should stop beating myself up for all the ways I'm not. All the things I'm not. The things I'm not doing, the things in my life I haven't changed. I am getting things done, nothing major but they are getting done. I am fostering which is fulfilling and enjoyable, my house is a mess, my kitchen is disgusting as usual. Jared does very little around here any more. Just the most basic of what I ...
  3. Merry Christmas

    Have been up since five, woke too soon. Instead of spending the day brooding about being broke and alone I spent Christmas Eve doing two of the things I love. Time at the club with friends then a quick hop to the bar with my bestie. Yes she is a snob, often selfish, but she is Princess to my Queen and I love her. I had two drinks, I don't know how many she had but when I got her home she was falling down drunk, then sobbing about the state of her life and how unhappy she was. I comforted her best ...
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  4. this is a accidental deletion

    been really funky. Warmish, the ground isn't even totally frozen. There is no snow though we are slated for snow on Christmas Even. That may have changed by now lol. Can't predict the weather here.

    I have my Christmas decor up and almost all the presents wrapped. No tree thanks to the kitten and my bad judgement in buying a fake tree. Not even worth the fifteen dollars. They had a few of them so am thinking they were heavily discounted and they bought a lot of them and resold.
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  5. I must get this down

    or I may forget but usually I remember these. It was night and I was in a very sleek large building. Almost like some kind of science facility. There was a lot of dream before this but this is what I held on to. I walked out onto a curved balcony, for a second I am facing myself standing there from a distance and get a sense and sight of how big the building is. lots of glass and metal. Oh and the moon, the moon is full, almost like sunlight. The balcony curves out onto the water and the moon is ...
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